I have an all-star cast of friends...I believe that friends and significant other are a reflection and extension of you and vice versus....I have a friend that I have known since the 5th grade. We are so much alike and one day we were having a conversation and I was asking her about her "new" friend. and she says to me I think he is in love with my situation not me....so lets ponder that...what she meant was she was a single black woman, no kids, i great job, an advance degree and wholly independent. And this guy was attracted to the fact that she has/is handling her business, but the same things that he found attracted also intimidated/scared him.
Today my line sister S23 wrote a post bout Permanent scars and it got me to thinking. I feel somewhat like S23 in that i refuse to be dependent on anyone. My last relationship my ex said the strangest thing to me, i was talking about a friend of mines that was needy and how I hope i didn't come off needy and he was like just the opposite, you never ask me for anything, which was true. He then goes on to say you are the kind of person if we just up and moved to south Dakota (yeah South Dakota) and while living there we broke up I wouldn't worry about you making it there on your own. (things that make you go hum...). I think the reason I have control issues, fear being weak and dependant is because of my paternals. My mom is SUPER INDEPENDENT she was the one who taught me how to check my oil (not that i do, hell that's what Firestone is for), i saw here make it work after my dad left. She made me clean, wash clothes, cut grass, fix shit. She taught me the difference between a flat head and a Philip screwdriver. Hell when I first moved to the Capitol city she bought me a car kit with jumper cables and what not and a tool box (only thing it didn't have was a hammer--cause you know i like to break shit). She taught me how to change a flat. so anyway my position on men was anything i need from a man i can buy, borrow or do it myself--- i have gone through life thinking that, but shit a girl gets tired. Being independent is hard work.
I think what changed my perspective was this guy I met...I met him in "graduate" school, my last year. When i met him i thought he was full of shit, i didn't feel like i could trust him and pretty much everything he was saying was a lie. Now mind you i had good reason to believe that but that is neither here nor there. Well after he graduated (he was a year behind me), we reconnected. We talked a little and then we feel off and then a couple months later after a fail relationship (yeah Mr. South Dakota) we reconnected. Well he made the check list---physical, emotional, intellectual and well the jury was still out about availability. Well he was perfect minus the question of availability, but initially I could not open up to him and give him a chance. Then one day he "got" me, it was like he completely understood what i needed. His position was I respect what you do during the day "saving the world and what not" but when you are around me I just want you to do you and let me do me" translation relax and let me worry about you. WTF!!! you mean release control and be at your will, nigga is you crazy---yes he was and I tried it and i liked it. I am no feminist nor am i at the opposite end....but the thought of not worrying about shit and being around someone I trusted, who i knew had the abilities to handle business as i would felt good. Though that situation didn't work out (cause i later learned he wasn't available) I know what I want. I want someone who CAN take care of me. He doesn't have to jump in and be bossy and authoritative, but he has to be strong and confident enough to let me be me and large enough to be him with me. I am not sure if that makes any sense. What I want (add it to the list) is a man who would be okay if I ruled the world but knows when i got home he was king and i was his queen and its his job to take care of me. No i am not talking gold digger talk I am saying that he give me what I need at home to handle the things i encounter outside the home (and yes I know that I have to provide the same support for him).
S23 mentioned about being a stay at home mom. I use to think that shit was for the birds, until one of my friends that I somewhat admire got married, got pregnant, had her kid and quit her job. Now my friend has a college degree from a prestigious school. We talk about 5 days a week and wow do i admire her. In the back of my head i am wondering if she has a plan B, but I see so many benefits to it. She does so much she manages her husband, the kids, the house, the social calender she does a lot. When i thought of housewives i thought of Peg Bundie from the show married with children. But when i hear about all the things she does with her girls i am like wow. I think the plan is once the youngest get in school she is going to go and get her masters and what not. I have so much respect for housewives and I wonder some days if i get married will I be able to do what i want to do.
I have a friend who is a mom, wife and corporate woman and i listen to her and how she had to cut back on her traveling how she has to cut back on her hours and I wonder can you give 150% to work AND 150% to my family?
So i guess in the mean damn time i will just do me until someone comes alone and requires me to make modification to my approach to life, meaning i have to consider others in my daily plans.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
12 hours of sleep
Man I haven't done that since like high school....everyone has there thing. some people like shopping, some people like reading, some like cooking my thing is sleeping. I truly enjoy it and loath anyone who comes between it on a continous basis. When i was in high school i functioned on 10 hours of sleep..no discussion and if i went to many days in a row with out my 10 hours there was hell to pay. in college i was the queen of naps and power naps if i had a hour of free time trust me i was naping. even my college boyfriend new about me and naps i told him this was bonding. We both worked on campus and would be done about 5 he would come over to my place and he would watch the news while holding me and i would be good and sleep. Around 7 we would eat and do homework and what not and go to bed and start our day over again. in graduate school for lunch i would go home eat lunch and take a power nap. I use to me occupy time with this guy in grad school and he new the ropes we would talk a little and i would pass out and get up and study and do things i needed to do. He said i slept like a pregnant woman what ever. Well one summer I did get checked because there would be mornings i could not get out of bed i just couldn't move. My mother is severly anemic so I had some blood work done and lo and behold the reason i sleep so much is medical i have thalsemia trait, nothing serious but i do have to make sure i eat more green vegetables to insure my iron intake. Well any that is not what my blog to be about.
This weekend I went to Houston to visit my best friend from college. Her husbands fraternity were celebrating 25 years...and they were hosting the bbq. so i went and had a ball. so my blog is based on my observations of two my my good friends relationships.
this week and last week.
LAST WEEK- i was hijacked (not kidnapped but hijacked)- my friend among my friends she is our role model, she is just "perfect" we so want to be like her when we grow up. She was the first of my friends to get married and so i some what saw this relationship develop. Well anyway her husband and I are in the same profession and the local black professionals were having a gala, which she invited me to and i told her i WAS NOT going. so i thought that was the end of our discussion. well she lives about an 1.5 away from me and she calls me and says my husband are i are on our way to the gala and we will pick you up at 8.WTF!!!! so i throw somethign together and i get picked up. Now i use to think that when people get married they lose themselves and become a shell of who they use to be. And i never wanted to lose my identity and what makes me me so marriage was not for me. Well watching them its like tag team (yes i use to be a WWF fan) it like magic. They work off each other, its like a well orcherstrated plan. so we get there and of course we are late and we get to our table. the husband grabs up drinks and after he brings up drinks we "break" he goes and visits the people he knows and she mingles wiht the other wives and people she knows. he would occasionally come and check on us but not in a hovering or sufficating manner. but htey are both working the room. so as the people leave and the night comes to an end they reconverge he with a man and she with his wife and believe it or not they have worked the entire room. so they had some goals (which i want disscuss) and as we are back in the limo they 'debrief' and have accomplished what they set out to do.
THIS WEEK
I went to visit my best friend. I have known this girl since my freshman year in college and when i say we have been through alot i mean ALOT. I remember when she first saw her husband and i remember there first date all of it so to see them tag team was like poetry. My best friend is the hostest with the mostest anyway but with her husband in tow they are AMAZING. now prior to the Bbq she planned it to the T. and issued out assignments for some reason the kid even fell into place. so he is on the grill she's in the house and they are wowing the guest. At the end of the party everyone is happy, drunk and full. and they have just pulled off another great event......TAG TEAM BACK AGAIN
okay i know you are like FREESPEECH 22 wtf...i am believing that you can be you 100% and your mate and be them at 100% and it all works well together. that's what i want someone who completes me and i complete them (J.maquire)
okay i am hungry i am going to lunch now.
This weekend I went to Houston to visit my best friend from college. Her husbands fraternity were celebrating 25 years...and they were hosting the bbq. so i went and had a ball. so my blog is based on my observations of two my my good friends relationships.
this week and last week.
LAST WEEK- i was hijacked (not kidnapped but hijacked)- my friend among my friends she is our role model, she is just "perfect" we so want to be like her when we grow up. She was the first of my friends to get married and so i some what saw this relationship develop. Well anyway her husband and I are in the same profession and the local black professionals were having a gala, which she invited me to and i told her i WAS NOT going. so i thought that was the end of our discussion. well she lives about an 1.5 away from me and she calls me and says my husband are i are on our way to the gala and we will pick you up at 8.WTF!!!! so i throw somethign together and i get picked up. Now i use to think that when people get married they lose themselves and become a shell of who they use to be. And i never wanted to lose my identity and what makes me me so marriage was not for me. Well watching them its like tag team (yes i use to be a WWF fan) it like magic. They work off each other, its like a well orcherstrated plan. so we get there and of course we are late and we get to our table. the husband grabs up drinks and after he brings up drinks we "break" he goes and visits the people he knows and she mingles wiht the other wives and people she knows. he would occasionally come and check on us but not in a hovering or sufficating manner. but htey are both working the room. so as the people leave and the night comes to an end they reconverge he with a man and she with his wife and believe it or not they have worked the entire room. so they had some goals (which i want disscuss) and as we are back in the limo they 'debrief' and have accomplished what they set out to do.
THIS WEEK
I went to visit my best friend. I have known this girl since my freshman year in college and when i say we have been through alot i mean ALOT. I remember when she first saw her husband and i remember there first date all of it so to see them tag team was like poetry. My best friend is the hostest with the mostest anyway but with her husband in tow they are AMAZING. now prior to the Bbq she planned it to the T. and issued out assignments for some reason the kid even fell into place. so he is on the grill she's in the house and they are wowing the guest. At the end of the party everyone is happy, drunk and full. and they have just pulled off another great event......TAG TEAM BACK AGAIN
okay i know you are like FREESPEECH 22 wtf...i am believing that you can be you 100% and your mate and be them at 100% and it all works well together. that's what i want someone who completes me and i complete them (J.maquire)
okay i am hungry i am going to lunch now.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
make it stop
today was a busy day in court i was left by myself for a while and it seemed like everyone wanted a piece of me.....i just wanted to scream stop.....in addition to that i have taken on the challenge of teaching online so i have to get my paper(online)work done, i have to buy a new computer, i have to do this, and do that.....i just want to cry but if it wasn't hectic i would be complaining....I am going to Houston this weekend to hang out with my best friend and her family they are sponsoring a BBQ for his fraternity and they want everyone to wear paraphnaelia....so i have to go and represent in my Crimson and Cream...i have never driven to Houston so i hope its a good drive looking at about 5 hrs on the road so hopefully i can get out of court and off work in a timely fashion, i need to pack, clean, get a pedicure and buy a baby shower gift before i leave....oh the humanity.....
I LOVE IT!!!!
I LOVE IT!!!!
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
High as a kite on crazy glue
yes you read that right. as i sit in my office trying to think about what organized chaos i could give you today i smell the familiar sents of crazy glue or some type of glue that has me feeling light headed....and now he has followed it with this loud ass machine that he calls a "router" I just don't believe this is OSHA compliant.
So I am back on my movie kick even though i have only watch one movie since Monday (the good shepard) I was left confused by this cinemia it was okay but i wanted more and i just didn't get. I started Surf's up (i have to stay current so i can keep up with my friends and there kids) but i got sleepy and i was gonna do Evan Almighty but it just didn't happened. Last nite i was feeling all nostoglic, you know how you start thinking about past beau and what could have been. But then i remembered they were ex's for a reason. I guess thats what i get for skipping church, but i was like a kids "talent show" and i just wasnt for it.
I may come back with more interesting things later but if not 3 days in a row.......yeah me.
do you all have any suggestions....
So I am back on my movie kick even though i have only watch one movie since Monday (the good shepard) I was left confused by this cinemia it was okay but i wanted more and i just didn't get. I started Surf's up (i have to stay current so i can keep up with my friends and there kids) but i got sleepy and i was gonna do Evan Almighty but it just didn't happened. Last nite i was feeling all nostoglic, you know how you start thinking about past beau and what could have been. But then i remembered they were ex's for a reason. I guess thats what i get for skipping church, but i was like a kids "talent show" and i just wasnt for it.
I may come back with more interesting things later but if not 3 days in a row.......yeah me.
do you all have any suggestions....
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
ain't nothing going on but the rent.....
dude do you all remember that song....it had the line "you gotta have a J-O-B if you wanna be with me" well anyway not sure why that song is in my head. my day is going rather well no one has really pissed me off and I am gonna try and get some work done....I have set a daily goal for some things in the office that i need to try to complete and well needless to say i am moving super slow on them.
One of the things I wanted to do when i moved to the capitol city was figure out what i wanted in a man cause i haven't seriously dated anyone in a year and that was a long distant relationship and before that I at situation but nothing i could hang my hat on and say he was my boyfriend and i was his girlfriend. Well i realized that 4 thing must come into play: (1) i must be physically attracted to you; (2) I must be intellectually stimulated by you; (3) I must be emotionally connected to you and (4) you got to be available.
Physical
I have realized that i am attracted to massive men. when i say massive that can mean many things from tall like a basketball play wide like a middle linebacker whichever it is you have to be bigger than me and I am a fluffy girl so little men need not apply. I am also attracted to men with great calf muscles or huge arms. I am not really into pretty boys cause I think that is borderline gay for a man to spend more time and money than me on maintenance. You don't have to be a gym junkie cause I am not gonna ask of you what I may not be willing to do. what else let see i thinks that it for the physical just be massive and you get extra points for nice "guns" and/or calves.
Intellectual
I love a man that i can just listen to and learn from....I am a sponge when it comes to being exposed to something new and different. I love a man that is smart, not like Albert Einstein so damn smart he cant tie his shoe and not condescending smart where i just want to slap him in the mouth when ever he speaks cause that's just lame. Ex. When I was in college there was this upperclassman who I just loved to hear talk, it was almost therapeutic to hear him speak. He was so informative, he knew a little bit about everything. I think I may be attracted to older men just because they are "wiser". I am attracted to somebody who I can just lay on the couch with and just talk wither its about sports, politics, movies shit cooking and gardening it matters not and feel like you respect my opinion and want to share with me everything you know about this subject. Not to sound crazy (not that i can sound any crazier than i already have) but if I think i am smarter than you then i so turned off. no i am not a Mensa candidate but if you can't admit that you don't know or if you try to belittle me to feel better about yourself or sound like one of those jackass the news always seems to find to express the opinion of the people then you need not apply, i need someone who can stimulate not only my body but my mind as well. I have to think long term what are we gonna do 20 years from now if we cant talk?
Emotional
this is probably the hardest one to master,because I am such a guarded person, I don't let people get to really know me because i refuse to be in a position where i am weak. I have control issues and i know this and opening up and letting emotions dictate the day requires to much letting go and i just don't do that, cause that's how you get hurt. not many people get here because usually they say something really ignorant and i dismiss them on the spot.
Available
now i know some wonderful guys but for some reason they just aren't available to me. What do i mean. Either they want an "OPEN" relationship, don't want commitment, have someone.
now that I have said all of that I forgot the most important thing they must be patient......cause if they aren't it just not gonna work.
I read somewhere probably S23's blog about knowing what you want in a man and so far i have come up with 4 things.
(1) Someone who I find physically attractive----MASSIVE
(2) Someone who I find intellectually stimulating---TEACHER
(3) Someone who I am emotionally connected to-----PATIENT
(4) Someone who is----AVAILABLE
so to some it up i want a patient massive man who i can learn from and who is available. IS THAT ASKING TO MUCH???
oh and based on my last office visit someone who doesn't hit woman or is crazy (certifiable)
One of the things I wanted to do when i moved to the capitol city was figure out what i wanted in a man cause i haven't seriously dated anyone in a year and that was a long distant relationship and before that I at situation but nothing i could hang my hat on and say he was my boyfriend and i was his girlfriend. Well i realized that 4 thing must come into play: (1) i must be physically attracted to you; (2) I must be intellectually stimulated by you; (3) I must be emotionally connected to you and (4) you got to be available.
Physical
I have realized that i am attracted to massive men. when i say massive that can mean many things from tall like a basketball play wide like a middle linebacker whichever it is you have to be bigger than me and I am a fluffy girl so little men need not apply. I am also attracted to men with great calf muscles or huge arms. I am not really into pretty boys cause I think that is borderline gay for a man to spend more time and money than me on maintenance. You don't have to be a gym junkie cause I am not gonna ask of you what I may not be willing to do. what else let see i thinks that it for the physical just be massive and you get extra points for nice "guns" and/or calves.
Intellectual
I love a man that i can just listen to and learn from....I am a sponge when it comes to being exposed to something new and different. I love a man that is smart, not like Albert Einstein so damn smart he cant tie his shoe and not condescending smart where i just want to slap him in the mouth when ever he speaks cause that's just lame. Ex. When I was in college there was this upperclassman who I just loved to hear talk, it was almost therapeutic to hear him speak. He was so informative, he knew a little bit about everything. I think I may be attracted to older men just because they are "wiser". I am attracted to somebody who I can just lay on the couch with and just talk wither its about sports, politics, movies shit cooking and gardening it matters not and feel like you respect my opinion and want to share with me everything you know about this subject. Not to sound crazy (not that i can sound any crazier than i already have) but if I think i am smarter than you then i so turned off. no i am not a Mensa candidate but if you can't admit that you don't know or if you try to belittle me to feel better about yourself or sound like one of those jackass the news always seems to find to express the opinion of the people then you need not apply, i need someone who can stimulate not only my body but my mind as well. I have to think long term what are we gonna do 20 years from now if we cant talk?
Emotional
this is probably the hardest one to master,because I am such a guarded person, I don't let people get to really know me because i refuse to be in a position where i am weak. I have control issues and i know this and opening up and letting emotions dictate the day requires to much letting go and i just don't do that, cause that's how you get hurt. not many people get here because usually they say something really ignorant and i dismiss them on the spot.
Available
now i know some wonderful guys but for some reason they just aren't available to me. What do i mean. Either they want an "OPEN" relationship, don't want commitment, have someone.
now that I have said all of that I forgot the most important thing they must be patient......cause if they aren't it just not gonna work.
I read somewhere probably S23's blog about knowing what you want in a man and so far i have come up with 4 things.
(1) Someone who I find physically attractive----MASSIVE
(2) Someone who I find intellectually stimulating---TEACHER
(3) Someone who I am emotionally connected to-----PATIENT
(4) Someone who is----AVAILABLE
so to some it up i want a patient massive man who i can learn from and who is available. IS THAT ASKING TO MUCH???
oh and based on my last office visit someone who doesn't hit woman or is crazy (certifiable)
Monday, April 21, 2008
oh i forgot the best part
after my father kicks me out of his hospital room he tells me to put his stuff out. So i take the day off from work and threw all of his shit out the house and some how it mysteraly got wet in the processs.....so now my father is back in San Diego with his silly hoe and my mother and i are just fine without him and all his damn drama and ghetto lifestyle
Let's see....
I think the last time I blogged i was living in the port city and I just bought my new car. Well a lot has happen since December. (1) I have moved, (2) my father lost his mind and well I think between those two I think that's enough.
Well as you may remember my father was staying with my mother and I, because he wanted a fresh start (yeah at49 my father is still trying to get his life together) but for some reason he could leave this woman completely alone. Now let me say i have never liked her. My first impression of her was that she was loud, ghetto and so damn inappropriate but whatever I didn't have to leave with her I was just visiting and would be back home in less than a week. But now that he was here its a little different. Well after Christmas I let me dad use my car with the understanding that he would pay the insurance and any maintenance. however, it did need some work so the first service i would split half with him. So we get the car fixed and the next weekend he is going to Dallas so he can fly out and go see her (needless to say I haven't seen a dime). well he get back and all is well so I think and then the weekend of super bowl comes. Well that Saturday we are just have a gay ole' time we chat and talk about what he is gonna do for the super bowl, so I go to the grocery store and when i get back he is no where around no big deal. So Sunday my mom and i get up to go to church and we see him and we leave. We get back from church and he is nowhere around (no big deal) it is super bowl Sunday. So i go to bingo and come home around 9 or 10 no sight of my father okay. so Monday morning comes and still no sight of my father. Well I get home from work on Monday and his jobs number is on our caller id.... I get a little worried and so I call him and he returns my call Tuesday morning and is like oh i am just hanging out....(what the hell I haven't seen you since Sunday its 2 days later and your job called her and what this is why i don't have kids.....) So i express my concern thinking okay he is gonna show is black ass up today....and nothing so Wednesday comes around and 7:00 am his job calls all frantic about him not being at work and there being a big accident on the interstate and what way does he come to work...(now in my head I am think that I can't tell these people my father is home and i haven't seen him since Sunday and I have no earthly idea what is going on with him. So my mother and I are calling him and calling him trying to figure out what the hell is going. so he calls my mom back and is like I am in the hospital. WTF!!! and Yvette is here: Now this is where I provide my list of reasons why I don't like here:
1.) like I said when i met her i thought she was loud inappropriate and ghetto.
2.) she has AIDS (not that i hate people with AIDS)- hell i think i can say this cause if you go on Oprah it ain't no secret
3.) she is a silly hoe- she allowed my father to put one of her daughters out of there home because he said that she disrespected him (i think any woman who chooses a man over her kids is a silly hoe)
4.) she is irresponsible- ghetto lifestyle like here daughter has gold (yes i said gold) braces but she is getting evicted from every place she lives
5.) she has a bench warrant
6.) she disrespected my mother and I
So I think that is a good start. So no my father is sitting up in the hospital (mind you the same damn hospital he works in) nobody has been contacted (now i did tell silly hoe she couldn't call our house ever again) not even his sister who lives/works around the corner from this hospital, his best friend. These dumb ass mother fuckers are sitting up in the hospital not gonna say a damn thing. and this silly hoe doesn't think to call a sole. So i call him and express my disappointment so I get up there and she is there looking all stupid. So i ask for my car keys and he is like how am i gonna get home. my response is call me I will come and get you (cause what the hell do you need a car for you are in Critical Care and it makes no sense to have my vehicle just sitting up here and when you get out you want be in any condition to drive and I know this bitch isn't driving my car). So then he tells me that my car has issues WTF!!! it didn't when i saw you on Sunday what happened.....So I get my car key and take the car and leave my new car. So I finally get both cars home and go to visit him..... Now by this time my aunt is there and she is worried about him. So the nurse is checking on him and is asking about his wife and i am looking real stupid cause his wife is back in California and what not. So i am pissed again cause you good and damn well that this woman is not your wife and don't be putting me in the middle of this shit and i sure as hell ain't lying for you. So I get home and I call his wife just to let her know that he is in the hospital but that the silly toxic hoe is here. Cause she was gonna come but when i told her that she was like i don't do drama. I was like i don't think coming would be a great ideal, but i just wanted you to know. so Thursday comes and goes and I don't go see him cause i am still disgusted by the situation. so my mom tells me that he wants his mail so Friday i go take him his mail before i go to work and to see how he is doing. so we are sitting there and i am asking him questions and he is really short with me so silly hoe comes in and he lights up like a damn Christmas tree. now to demonstrate how silly this hoe is my father is in critical care with pneumonia, he has half a lung and is on breathing treatments. What does she show up with got damn pollen infested flowers and a stuffed animal...hell she may have just brought in some ragweed and mold...so i leave and stop by the nurses station to find out who the contact person is because his wife has been asking about his status. So the nurse is so thankful because this could be a potential liability issue if they don't contact the appropriate people regarding his health. So as i am leaving i call my mom who isn't answering. so i get to my car and she calls me back and in that motherly you in trouble voice she says...."WHAT ARE YOU UP THERE DOING, YOUR DAD JUST CALLED AND SAID THAT YOU ARE MAKING HIS LIFE A LIVING HELL". SO i am pissed and i go back to his room and cuss him out and tell him about some of my issues with him from when i was a child and what not. he kicks me out of his room the nurse ask me to leave and that's the last time i speak to my sperm donor....well a few days later i get a call offer me a job in the Capitol city and i jump on it. I moved here the beginning of march and moved into my place about 2 weeks later so far so good. I will have to blog more cause i need the therapy.
Well as you may remember my father was staying with my mother and I, because he wanted a fresh start (yeah at49 my father is still trying to get his life together) but for some reason he could leave this woman completely alone. Now let me say i have never liked her. My first impression of her was that she was loud, ghetto and so damn inappropriate but whatever I didn't have to leave with her I was just visiting and would be back home in less than a week. But now that he was here its a little different. Well after Christmas I let me dad use my car with the understanding that he would pay the insurance and any maintenance. however, it did need some work so the first service i would split half with him. So we get the car fixed and the next weekend he is going to Dallas so he can fly out and go see her (needless to say I haven't seen a dime). well he get back and all is well so I think and then the weekend of super bowl comes. Well that Saturday we are just have a gay ole' time we chat and talk about what he is gonna do for the super bowl, so I go to the grocery store and when i get back he is no where around no big deal. So Sunday my mom and i get up to go to church and we see him and we leave. We get back from church and he is nowhere around (no big deal) it is super bowl Sunday. So i go to bingo and come home around 9 or 10 no sight of my father okay. so Monday morning comes and still no sight of my father. Well I get home from work on Monday and his jobs number is on our caller id.... I get a little worried and so I call him and he returns my call Tuesday morning and is like oh i am just hanging out....(what the hell I haven't seen you since Sunday its 2 days later and your job called her and what this is why i don't have kids.....) So i express my concern thinking okay he is gonna show is black ass up today....and nothing so Wednesday comes around and 7:00 am his job calls all frantic about him not being at work and there being a big accident on the interstate and what way does he come to work...(now in my head I am think that I can't tell these people my father is home and i haven't seen him since Sunday and I have no earthly idea what is going on with him. So my mother and I are calling him and calling him trying to figure out what the hell is going. so he calls my mom back and is like I am in the hospital. WTF!!! and Yvette is here: Now this is where I provide my list of reasons why I don't like here:
1.) like I said when i met her i thought she was loud inappropriate and ghetto.
2.) she has AIDS (not that i hate people with AIDS)- hell i think i can say this cause if you go on Oprah it ain't no secret
3.) she is a silly hoe- she allowed my father to put one of her daughters out of there home because he said that she disrespected him (i think any woman who chooses a man over her kids is a silly hoe)
4.) she is irresponsible- ghetto lifestyle like here daughter has gold (yes i said gold) braces but she is getting evicted from every place she lives
5.) she has a bench warrant
6.) she disrespected my mother and I
So I think that is a good start. So no my father is sitting up in the hospital (mind you the same damn hospital he works in) nobody has been contacted (now i did tell silly hoe she couldn't call our house ever again) not even his sister who lives/works around the corner from this hospital, his best friend. These dumb ass mother fuckers are sitting up in the hospital not gonna say a damn thing. and this silly hoe doesn't think to call a sole. So i call him and express my disappointment so I get up there and she is there looking all stupid. So i ask for my car keys and he is like how am i gonna get home. my response is call me I will come and get you (cause what the hell do you need a car for you are in Critical Care and it makes no sense to have my vehicle just sitting up here and when you get out you want be in any condition to drive and I know this bitch isn't driving my car). So then he tells me that my car has issues WTF!!! it didn't when i saw you on Sunday what happened.....So I get my car key and take the car and leave my new car. So I finally get both cars home and go to visit him..... Now by this time my aunt is there and she is worried about him. So the nurse is checking on him and is asking about his wife and i am looking real stupid cause his wife is back in California and what not. So i am pissed again cause you good and damn well that this woman is not your wife and don't be putting me in the middle of this shit and i sure as hell ain't lying for you. So I get home and I call his wife just to let her know that he is in the hospital but that the silly toxic hoe is here. Cause she was gonna come but when i told her that she was like i don't do drama. I was like i don't think coming would be a great ideal, but i just wanted you to know. so Thursday comes and goes and I don't go see him cause i am still disgusted by the situation. so my mom tells me that he wants his mail so Friday i go take him his mail before i go to work and to see how he is doing. so we are sitting there and i am asking him questions and he is really short with me so silly hoe comes in and he lights up like a damn Christmas tree. now to demonstrate how silly this hoe is my father is in critical care with pneumonia, he has half a lung and is on breathing treatments. What does she show up with got damn pollen infested flowers and a stuffed animal...hell she may have just brought in some ragweed and mold...so i leave and stop by the nurses station to find out who the contact person is because his wife has been asking about his status. So the nurse is so thankful because this could be a potential liability issue if they don't contact the appropriate people regarding his health. So as i am leaving i call my mom who isn't answering. so i get to my car and she calls me back and in that motherly you in trouble voice she says...."WHAT ARE YOU UP THERE DOING, YOUR DAD JUST CALLED AND SAID THAT YOU ARE MAKING HIS LIFE A LIVING HELL". SO i am pissed and i go back to his room and cuss him out and tell him about some of my issues with him from when i was a child and what not. he kicks me out of his room the nurse ask me to leave and that's the last time i speak to my sperm donor....well a few days later i get a call offer me a job in the Capitol city and i jump on it. I moved here the beginning of march and moved into my place about 2 weeks later so far so good. I will have to blog more cause i need the therapy.
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